In Managing Self

I am optimistic and positive. It comes naturally to me and I know how it “feels”. For those of you for whom this perspective is more difficult to appreciate, I offer you the 3 P’s for consideration.

Optimists don’t view the world or the things in it as:
Personal
Pervasive or
Permanent.

If you want to try to shift your thinking to a more positive frame, remind yourself of these 3 P’s the next time you feel yourself falling down:

Whatever is happening is likely not Personal:
We have a tendency to think that many things are about us. The fact is, they often aren’t! i.e. that client who is angry at you is likely angry at the situation – you just happen to be in front of them.

Events, experiences and feelings are not Pervasive
Have you ever said to yourself, “this always happens to me!” or “I can’t catch a break!” or “everything sucks!” I think if you look, you will find parts of your life that are in fact OK…. it may be hard to see them at times, and I’m confident that they are there. Be mindful of your “everything”, “always” and “never” language. Instead – be more specific, because when we are, we are less likely to see things as pervasive.

Not much is Permanent
While we want some things to last, even when they do, they likely change. Change and transition are part of our world, and so seeing things as “forever” is likely not serving you well. Things change, feelings change, perspectives change, we change.

Stay open, be aware of increasing your positivity, and spread it around! 🙂

And here’s your homework:
For the next 48 hours, when you notice yourself going down that rabbit hole of “ain’t it awful, poor me, this always happens”, STOP and ask yourself:
Is this really about me?
Is it in every part of my life?
Is this forever?
Then notice, when you answer those questions, how it shifts your perspective – and likely to a more positive place.